Have you tried feeding him finger foods? I remember my kids liking to feed themselves more at that age than being fed, although they did eat when I fed them, so I really am not sure what other advice to give you in that aspect. As for the milk, I could never get any of my three to drink regular milk until they were at least 2 years old. I was breastfeeding regularly still so they weren’t missing any of the nutrients that the milk provided. I would suggest, if you have been using formula, to switch to a toddler formula, or if you have been breastfeeding and have weened him already to try a toddler formula or an alternative milk (soy milk, rice milk, oat milk, or goat’s milk). You may not like the flavor of them but sometimes taste has a lot of bearing on what a one year old drinks and eats. And like all the others have said, he only needs a few 8 oz. cups of milk a day and it (or it’s substitute) should be whole because a baby that age needs the fat that it provides. I really hope this helps! I wondered for the longest time why my first would absolutely refuse milk for a year, but when it happened to the second and then the third I didn’t stress as much and just made sure their diets were high in fats like cheese. Good luck!!